Fudgy Wudgy

       No. Just no. You don't name an ice cream flavor "fudgy wudgy." That is wrong.
       I went to the States today (again!) and we went for ice cream. I only really ever order chocolate ice cream, but the only chocolate they had was called.... Fudgy Wudgy. So of course I am standing in line trying to think of ways to order it without actually having to say the name. And finally I come up with a genius idea just to ask:
       "What is your chocolatiest flavor?"
       Of course they said, "Fudgy Wudgy."
       "Sounds good."
       FTW!
       My idea didn't backfire until we had our ice cream and I thought I'd be funny, so I asked,
       "So, you get a lot of people who are embarrassed to order that flavor?" (insert "I are funny" smile)
       By then the two cashiers were having a conversation without me so I just stood there awkwardly until I realized they hadn't heard me. Then a tumbleweed blew in so I left.

When I Panic I Go Like This

       Whenever something happens that I don't know how to deal with, I flap my arms from the elbow down like a panicked bird that can't fly. Actually it looks like how chickens look when you scare them. It's really pointless because I can't fly away.
       Once I was in a bank with my sister and it wasn't our usual bank so I couldn't find the ATM's. I started the flappy thing with my arms and said "WULLLLLL!!!!" in a retared, strangled sounding voice and glanced around wildly trying to find them. Eventually a lady working at the bank came up to us and smiling sympathetically, directed us to the ATM's, which were about 20 feet away directly in front of us. I was like, "Oh."
       My sister was embarrassed to be seen with me that day. I kinda was too.